The Happiness Lab with Dr. Laurie Santos
Why “No Regrets” Is Bad Advice

Episode 25 · Season 11

Why “No Regrets” Is Bad Advice

The Happiness Lab with Dr. Laurie Santos

June 22, 202630:57

About this episode

<p>We&rsquo;ve all had moments we wish we could do over: the relationship we stayed in too long, the opportunity we didn&rsquo;t take, the thing we said that we can&rsquo;t unsay. Regret can feel awful. So it&rsquo;s no surprise that &ldquo;no regrets&rdquo; has become a popular life motto. But what if regret isn't actually the enemy?</p> <p>In this episode from <em>The Happiness Lab</em> archives, Dr. Laurie explores the surprising science of regret with authors <a href="https://www.danpink.com/">Daniel Pink</a> and <a href="https://www.fosslien.com/">Liz Fosslien</a>. Together, they explain why our biggest regrets can reveal what we value most, help us make better decisions, and even point us toward a happier future.</p> <p>If you've ever found yourself stuck replaying an old mistake, this episode offers a more productive way to look back.</p> <p><strong>Experts Mentioned:</strong></p> <ul> <li><a href="https://www.danpink.com/">Daniel Pink</a>, non-fiction author</li> <li><a href="https://www.fosslien.com/">Liz Fosslien</a>, author, illustrator, and expert in workplace culture and emotions</li> <li><a href="https://molliewestduffy.com/">Mollie West Duffy</a>, author, illustrator, and expert in organizational development</li> <li><a href="https://www.augusten.com/">Augusten Burroughs</a>, author and memoirist</li> <li><a href="https://bronnieware.com/">Bronnie Ware</a>, author and palliative carer&nbsp;</li> </ul> <p><strong>Resources Mentioned:</strong></p> <ul> <li>&ldquo;<a href="https://www.lizandmollie.com/">Liz + Mollie</a>&rdquo;</li> <li><a href="https://www.amazon.com/Big-Feelings-Okay-When-Things/dp/0593418239"><em>Big Feelings: How to Be Okay When Things Are&nbsp; Not Okay</em></a><em>, by Liz Fosslien and Mollie West Duffy (2022)</em></li> <li><a href="https://www.amazon.com/Power-Regret-Looking-Backward-Forward/dp/0735210659"><em>Power of Regret: How Looking Backward Moves Us Forward</em></a><em>, by Daniel Pink (2022)</em></li> <li><a href="https://www.amazon.com/Top-Five-Regrets-Dying-Transformed/dp/140194065X"><em>The Top Five Regrets of the Dying:&nbsp; A Life Transformed by the Dearly Departing</em></a>, by Bronnie Ware (2011)</li> <li>&ldquo;<a href="https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/pdf/10.1177/0146167210393256?casa_token=wr3_gS7VSLIAAAAA:xVdemmc-HfadLq9Q7yuYv6pSVBsjJSd2VYOZcLoqn_FtS34AyKPqCM9b-RcnTaWqr4qZdkBM-gk">Making Up for Lost Opportunities: The Protective Role of Downward Social Comparisons for Coping With Regrets Across Adulthood</a>,&rdquo; by Isabelle Bauer and Carsten Wrosch (2011)</li> </ul> <p><em>&nbsp;</em><strong>Related Episodes&nbsp;</strong></p> <ul> <li>&ldquo;<a href="https://www.pushkin.fm/podcasts/the-happiness-lab-with-dr-laurie-santos/how-to-identify-your-negative-emotions">How to Identify Your Negative Emotions</a>&rdquo;</li> <li>&ldquo;<a href="https://www.pushkin.fm/podcasts/the-happiness-lab-with-dr-laurie-santos/how-to-be-angry-better">How to Be Angry Better</a>&rdquo;</li> <li>&ldquo;<a href="https://www.pushkin.fm/podcasts/the-happiness-lab-with-dr-laurie-santos/why-nostalgia-aint-so-rosy">Why Nostalgia Ain't So Rosy</a>&rdquo;</li> </ul><p>See <a href="https://omnystudio.com/listener">omnystudio.com/listener</a> for privacy information.</p>